I’ve always driven a second-hand car.  From the time I got my student permit when I was 16, I practiced on my Dad’s Mitsubishi Lancer L-type. Later, when I was at the College of Law, I occasionally drove his 1983 Ford Laser.  When I got married, my husband bought a sporty German-made car, a 1974 Scirocco Volkswagen which had an automatic transmission.  We later bought a 1983 Suzuki Fronte.  And then, we bought our 1994 Mitsubishi Lancer EL in 2003 when my kids were in pre-school.  Like I said, I have no problems driving a second-hand car as long as it runs smoothly and the air conditioning is working fine.

I drove around to get to my court hearings in Malolos and Baliwag on that Scirocco.  I went to my hearings in Antipolo and Binangonan in the Fronte.  I drove myself to the hospital in the Fronte after my bag of waters broke — I gave birth to my son within four hours of having driven myself to the hospital.  My brother-in-law drove me for a check up to the PGH also in the Fronte and I gave birth two hours later. I have fond memories of all our second-hand cars.

My brother-in-law, Ding was our source of second-hand cars.  He bought and sold vintage as well as newer cars.  He had so many friends and acquaintances who bought, sold, restored and collected vintage cars.  He was the person I called whenever I had problems with any of our second-hand cars.  When we moved to Meycauayan, it was my brother-in-law Bobby whom we called for our automotive emergencies.  His buddy, Fireman John, was our mechanic of choice.

During the Habagat season in 2012, when I was bringing my husband into the emergency room because he was in gastric distress, our Lancer broke down in the middle of the Marilao Bridge. It was rainy, and the streetlights were off.  Our battery connection was acting up and our headlights and hazard lights wouldn’t come on.  Our distributor was wet because of the floods we waded through.  18-wheeler trucks whizzed past us and for the first time in my life, I actually felt that my life was in danger.  After that incident, my husband and I began praying for a newer car. By that time, my brother-in-law, Ding, had passed away and with his passing, our connections to second-hand cars also passed into oblivion.

I didn’t want to get a car from online sites as the car dealer who was found murdered had met buyers on those online sites.  It was too dangerous.  Our best bet were the repossessed cars from the banks.  We checked out the previously-owned cars on the different websites of PSBank, BDO and BPI.

About a week before my son’s graduation, we were on our way from our house to do errands and pay bills at the SM Marilao.  When we were just in front of the Lias Elementary School, the clutch cable broke.  We stalled right in front of the school gate just as all the students were streaming out of the school.  Our car, by that time, was pumping oil and had a sliding clutch.  It was only by the grace of God that our car brought us to places we need to go. After that incident, we prayed in earnest.  We knew that our car had just a few weeks of use before it totally broke down.

On one of our trips to SM Marilao, we happened to pass by the Ford showroom.  We went there to ask about certified pre-owned cars.   A certified pre-owned car suited me fine: it had been checked out by the dealer, so it would be road worthy; it wouldn’t quite cost as much as a brand-new car; it wouldn’t be too flashy; and it wouldn’t be a magnet for carnapping.  More importantly, it would be within easy financial reach (we wouldn’t have to modify our spending or saving habits too much) and it wouldn’t raise any eyebrows or begin any lifestyle checks.  We figured if we can get a car for about P250,000 to P350,000 we’d be in pretty good shape to find a car that would give us at least five years of good service.

The lady at the Ford asked me why I wanted a pre-owned car when I can get a brand new car as they were all on sale.  They had a summer promo.  We looked at the Ford Focus and the Ford Fiesta and we all shook our heads.  Those cars were five-seaters and it would be suitable for us if only my husband, my kids and I would ride in it.  If we all hitched a ride with my husband and my brother-in-law who drove for him, my kids and I would hardly fit in the back seat.  The kids have grown and I’ve grown wider!

We at first wanted a certified pre-owned Ford Escape because it seemed roomy.  I was saddened to know that the Ford Escape only came with automatic transmission.  There was no unit of the Ford Escape that was released in the Philippines that had a manual transmission.  I have nothing against a car with automatic transmission — they are very convenient to drive in traffic.  My problem with this is that automatic cars usually have on-board computers and out here in Bulacan, there wouldn’t be a mechanic that can fix a car with an on-board computer.  My husband and I agreed that we wanted a car with a manual transmission as it was more practical.

The agent at the Ford Marilao showed us the 2014 Ford Everest.  Our kids explored the car.  My husband and I just hung back. We looked at each other and we both had the same thought: it would probably not fit in our narrow garage and it was too high, my husband would have difficulty getting in and out of the car as he had polio.  The agent told us that the down payment was only P58,999.  But the total cash out which would include the comprehensive insurance for the first three years would be P89,999.  She said that if we got approved for financing at the BPI, the bank would shoulder the insurance and our total cash out would only be P58,999. That got my husband’s attention but both of us had a nagging question in our heads: “Why would they be selling that car at such a low down payment?”  Surely there was something wrong with that car?  We just couldn’t believe it. We were hesitant as we wouldn’t want to get a brand-new car only to find out that it was a brand-new lemon.

We went away from that and decided to look at other cars at other dealers.  When we got home, we measured the width of the garage and we found out that it can accommodate the Everest snugly.  We can get in and out with relative ease even when the car was in the garage.  So we began to pray really hard for guidance and for peace of mind about buying such a costly brand-new car.

Last Christmas, the church gave my Dad a new car.  As I was talking to my Dad, the men of the church who were there said to my Dad, “Pastor, ibigay mo na yung Pajero mo kay Ma’am Bimbi.”  My Dad said, “Naku, hindi tatanggapin niyan kahit na ano pa ang ibigay ko sa kanya lalo na’t luma.”  So I said to my Dad, “Yung Diyos mo na nagbigay sa iyo niyang bagong kotse mo, Diyos ko rin iyon.  Bibigyan niya ako kung gusto niya.”  All the men who were there laughed and said, “Pastor, sa iyo pala nagmana si Ma’am Bimbi.”

I prayed that God would show us if this was the car for us.  I was afraid of the cash outlay and 60 months of payments thereafter.  My husband was thinking that perhaps we might not be approved for a car loan as he would be retiring in a few years. More importantly, I was afraid that having a brand new car might make me proud.  I was afraid that I might be asking for a car simply to satisfy my lust for the good life and for a status symbol.  I did not want to presume upon the grace and goodness of God.  I did not want to be too ambitious, desiring to keep up with the fashion and purchase a brand-new car only to default on payments; or worse, to live a life full of stress because we needed to earn money to keep up with the payments.  My husband and I have very few quarrels between us in the twenty years we have been married ( I think I can count in the fingers of one hand the times we have ever disagreed) and I don’t want us to fight over money.  Life is too short for that. No car is worth marital discord. Besides, I don’t want to have a brand-new car that will only put our lives and our security in danger if it will invite a car jacking.

In other words, I wanted a car only because we needed it.  I was asking God for a car because we needed it.  I wasn’t asking God for a brand-new car, only for a serviceable and reliable one.  I want a car that God would choose for us, one that would be a blessing to us and one that would bring us closer to the Lord and make us more dependent upon his grace and provision.  I remember in the Psalms, there was a verse that described Israel asking God for meat in the desert and God gave them the meat as it was what their hearts desired but it brought ‘leanness to their soul’  — that was what I did not want.  No brand new car is worth leanness of soul.  I wanted a car that God in his good pleasure would give to us. I don’t want to twist God’s arm for him to give us this brand new car.  I want God’s perfect will because that is best.  I wouldn’t want to buy a brand new car and then, because we have to make the car payments we would make decisions that would tarnish our integrity and our conscience.  No car was worth living in sin for. No car was worth the displeasure of God upon our lives.

Apparently, my husband was also searching his heart and asking God to direct him.  After a few days, we found ourselves wide awake so early in the morning and we talked — we both agreed that the only way we could know if purchasing the Everest was God’s will for us was if we actually applied for a loan for it.  If it is God’s will, then we will get approved. If we do not even apply, it would be faithlessness on our part.  After all, we have been asking God for a newer car since 2012.  Now that the opportunity has presented itself, how can we stand and hesitate?  We asked the Lord if it would be possible for us to get the Everest with only a cash out of P58,999.  That would be the confirmatory sign.

The week before Holy Week, my husband received two phone calls, one from PSBank and one from East West bank.  A day after the phone call, East West bank sent my husband a text message that his loan had been approved.  We looked at the text and we saw that we had been approved for a loan but our cash out was P89,999.  We were cheerful and we thought that, oh well, we can wait for God to give us a car He wanted for us. A day later, the same bank called and asked us when we were going to sign the papers and get the unit. My husband said that we were waiting for a call from BPI as we wanted a low cash-out.  The loan officer said that he would call us back. The next day, he called to say that they can give us a low cash-out.

We wanted a black car.  That was a consensus.  But then, the last black unit had been reserved just two hours before our reservation was processed.  They only had a grey one.  My husband and I shrugged our shoulders — we didn’t want to get what we wanted — we wanted one that God wanted for us.  What would make the car special was that we waited for God to choose one for us, for him to open the way for us to get one, and for him to provide the money with which to pay for it.  My husband and I joked that we might as well buy a brand new car and pay for it in installments — if the Rapture occurs, we wouldn’t have to pay the installments as we would meet the Lord  in the air and so shall we ever be with the Lord — we wouldn’t need a car in heaven. 

So, now, for the first time in my life, I am 47 years old and I am driving around in a brand new car.  I don’t feel proud because of it, I am humbled that God took the time to lead us to get that car.  I didn’t quite expect that when I asked God for a car, He would actually give me a brand-new 2014 Ford Everest.  We were only hoping for a car that was bago-bago.  We just needed a car that was not a jalopy (kotseng karag-karag).  God is able to do exceeding abundantly above all we ask of think.  If I trust Him and I trust Him to choose for me, He will give me that which He thinks is best for me (I learned that lesson when I asked for a husband — I let God choose for me.).  And it is true what the Bible says: the gifts and calling of God are without repentance. I wanted God’s best for me and He gave me what was best for me. Lord, I will only want what you will give.  I trust your wisdom — you choose for us.  Open the way for us. That was how we prayed.

My only prayer is that each time I see that car, my heart will be filled with praise and thanksgiving to God. It’s a car God gave us because we badly needed a car.  It wasn’t a car I worked hard for.  It wasn’t a car I deserved.  It wasn’t a car I loved or liked.  It was a car given to us by God’s gracious hand because of our great need.  God supplies our need.   Thank you, Lord.